Why PRAYING Doesn’t Work

Why PRAYING Doesn’t Work

The difference between a prayer and a manifestation.

I have been exploring my spirituality for decades.  I think we all have, in one form or another.  Through loss and through life, we are always feeling into what this life experience is and what’s underneath it all.  What is the PURPOSE of life?  Why are we here? 

I’ve been exploring it, but I have always KNOWN it.  I always felt it – that deeper calling, that resonance, that BELIEF and that grace. 

Even as a kid I knew there was something bigger than me that was guiding me forward.  In the 70’s and 80’s we called it ESP.  I felt and I knew I had whatever that was.  Extra Sensory Perception – or a 6th sense – intuition – an ability to tap into another dimension.  I feel it is available to everyone.  It’s just that some of us are more open to it and have a more heightened awareness of it. 

With this knowingness life feels easier at times and a lot harder at times.  Sometimes it’s comforting.  Sometimes it’s confrontational.  Sometimes it’s weird and sometimes it’s wonderful.  But it was always, ALWAYS there to pull me forward and to help me in the darkest of times.  Times like when my sister died, when my Dad left, when the divorce was final, when I saw how broken our family was and when I took that leap out into the real world without a safety net.  There was always a power greater than me that I could lean on. 

I never really prayed except for one time when my sister was in a coma.  I prayed for her to stay here and to get better.  I prayed for her not to die.  When she did die,  I never prayed again.  It never felt right to me.  It felt like I was begging and pleading for something that was beyond my control. I was.


difference between prayer and manifestationI remember when things shifted from praying, or not praying into placing orders.  I was in college, getting my degree in theater, and I decided I wanted a certain part in a play.  I wanted it really badly but the odds were stacked against me.  There was a senior girl who always got the leads.  But I had such a strong desire so I asked for it.  I didn’t pray for it.  I announced it.  It was more of a “I will have this!” and not a “please can I have this.”  I demanded it.  I expected it.  I declared it. I wasn’t going to back down from it.  I auditioned with a KNOWINGNESS that I was getting that part.  During the audition I was pretending I was playing the part on stage.  I wasn’t auditioning for it.  I was BEING it. 

And I got it.  I didn’t even need to look at the sheet of paper with the parts announced.  I knew it.  With every fiber of my being I knew it. 

This was a different type of prayer.  Today I know it was a manifestation and I can see how and why it was so effective. 

I decided that I wanted it.  I knew I could have it.  I declared it. I acted as if it already happened.  I was BEING it, before I even got it.  I expected it, beyond a shadow of a doubt.  I KNEW it was mine.  And…. I let it go.  I never sat for a moment in the possibility that I wouldn’t have it but I also let go of any attachment to it.  I ALLOWED it in through my detachment. 

This is how manifesting works.  It is different from a prayer for me, it’s a knowingness, an expectation and a decision.  We align with it and allow it in and it’s ours.   

If you want help with manifesting stay tuned for a chance to jump in on the new round of my group coaching program.

How I Apply the Magic Formula of Determination + Accountability

How I Apply the Magic Formula of Determination + Accountability

Today’s situation… I had workout clothes on since 7 am, trying desperately to squeeze in a workout ALL day. I reached out to 15-20 (literally) babysitters to watch the kids so John and I could go out to dinner. I juggled work, play, kids, dog, lunch, parks, cousins, sugar highs, tired kids, etc. At one point I couldn’t  remember the last time I ate.  This is a VERY typical Saturday. Or any day. 

One thing I’ve learned in my journey of personal growth and expansion is… 

Determination + Accountability = Magic formula 

With determination I can get my workouts in. I am ALWAYS ALWAYS finding ways to hold myself accountable or have others hold me accountable. In this case I have an accountability group that I told I would workout hard 5 times this week. So now I HAVE to workout today. I already missed one day. Tomorrow is no guarantee. I need the drive and I need the accountability. So I squeezed in a workout: 25 minutes of running, jump squats and push-ups while running an errand. Perfection. 

AND….

I found a sitter on attempt number 21 about an hour before our dinner reservation. 

I. Was. Determined. And I was held accountable by that same group. I told them I would plan a fun date night by the end of the week.  I feel Iike these 2 things in combination are highly underrated.  I could have given up on sitter request number 8 or when dinner plans were only 2 hours away but I didn’t.  I kept texting John and our friends that I was “getting closer”. 

Listen, I want to be held accountable for things that will move my life forward. I’ve danced around going on weekly date nights for years. I said I wanted to but didn’t do it. I tried for a while but then let stuff with the kids get in the way. But I know all too well how much it enhances our relationship. 

So excuses be gone.  I want YOU to hold me accountable for a weekly date night. And we can all witness as my relationship improves. Who’s with me? Want in?

Determination + Accountability = Magic

Do You Allow Others to Determine Your Mood?

Do You Allow Others to Determine Your Mood?

When you allow the insignificant actions of other people to determine your mood, you lose.  You give your power away.  I hear from my clients on a daily basis that “someone” threw their day off.

 

“My Mom is so passive aggressive.” 

“My husband is so negative.” 

“My kids’ words are so hurtful.” 

“My sister is so judgmental.” 


And then we shrink.  We forget our power and we fall back into old patterns and behavior.  
And guess what……??? We do exactly what we’re shaming them for doing.  We act passive aggressively. We get negative and judgmental.  We’re hurtful with our words about them. We’re being a smaller version of ourselves. And we’re also feeling superior and kind of like a victim and the hero all at once.  Our ego is in heaven.  But it’s not enough just to have this insight and hope we’ll do better next time.  Hope is not a plan.

We need to create new patterns and behaviors. 

We need to create a new personality. One that won’t get rattled by the insignificant words or actions from someone else.  That new personality can be unshakeable.  Only then can we design a new reality.  One that will lead to our dream life.

We think it’s easy, but it’s not.  It takes work.  It takes new tools.  It takes accountability.  These new patterns and behaviors don’t make themselves.  We are continuously tested and pushed. But listen, isn’t this life worth it?  

The work pays off when we find more inner peace.  When we have more joy-filled days.  When we don’t get triggered, we control our reactions and all of that leads to more happy moments and special memories.  

If we don’t do the work we’re missing out.  Life is too short to live it in judgment of other people.  There’s a better way.  

Where are YOU giving away your power?