personal development Archives

How I Apply the Magic Formula of Determination + Accountability

Today’s situation… I had workout clothes on since 7 am, trying desperately to squeeze in a workout ALL day. I reached out to 15-20 (literally) babysitters to watch the kids so John and I could go out to dinner. I juggled work, play, kids, dog, lunch, parks, cousins, sugar highs, tired kids, etc. At one point I couldn’t remember the last time I ate. This is a VERY typical Saturday. Or any day.

One thing I’ve learned in my journey of personal growth and expansion is…

Determination + Accountability = Magic formula

With determination I can get my workouts in. I am ALWAYS ALWAYS finding ways to hold myself accountable or have others hold me accountable. In this case I have an accountability group that I told I would workout hard 5 times this week. So now I HAVE to workout today. I already missed one day. Tomorrow is no guarantee. I need the drive and I need the accountability. So I squeezed in a workout: 25 minutes of running, jump squats and push-ups while running an errand. Perfection.

AND….

I found a sitter on attempt number 21 about an hour before our dinner reservation.

I. Was. Determined. And I was held accountable by that same group. I told them I would plan a fun date night by the end of the week. I feel Iike these 2 things in combination are highly underrated. I could have given up on sitter request number 8 or when dinner plans were only 2 hours away but I didn’t. I kept texting John and our friends that I was “getting closer”.

Listen, I want to be held accountable for things that will move my life forward. I’ve danced around going on weekly date nights for years. I said I wanted to but didn’t do it. I tried for a while but then let stuff with the kids get in the way. But I know all too well how much it enhances our relationship.

So excuses be gone. I want YOU to hold me accountable for a weekly date night. And we can all witness as my relationship improves. Who’s with me? Want in?

Determination + Accountability = Magic

Do You Allow Others to Determine Your Mood?

When you allow the insignificant actions of other people to determine your mood, you lose. You give your power away. I hear from my clients on a daily basis that “someone” threw their day off.

“My Mom is so passive aggressive.”

“My husband is so negative.”

“My kids’ words are so hurtful.”

“My sister is so judgmental.”

And then we shrink. We forget our power and we fall back into old patterns and behavior. And guess what……??? We do exactly what we’re shaming them for doing. We act passive aggressively. We get negative and judgmental. We’re hurtful with our words about them. We’re being a smaller version of ourselves. And we’re also feeling superior and kind of like a victim and the hero all at once. Our ego is in heaven. But it’s not enough just to have this insight and hope we’ll do better next time. Hope is not a plan.

We need to create new patterns and behaviors.

We need to create a new personality. One that won’t get rattled by the insignificant words or actions from someone else. That new personality can be unshakeable. Only then can we design a new reality. One that will lead to our dream life.

We think it’s easy, but it’s not. It takes work. It takes new tools. It takes accountability. These new patterns and behaviors don’t make themselves. We are continuously tested and pushed. But listen, isn’t this life worth it?

The work pays off when we find more inner peace. When we have more joy-filled days. When we don’t get triggered, we control our reactions and all of that leads to more happy moments and special memories.

If we don’t do the work we’re missing out. Life is too short to live it in judgment of other people. There’s a better way.

Where are YOU giving away your power?