How To Prepare Your Kids While You’re Away (Tips for Overcoming Mom Guilt)

How To Prepare Your Kids While You’re Away (Tips for Overcoming Mom Guilt)

I’m an advocate of Moms traveling solo. I travel for work often. Next week I’m leaving for Pula, Croatia to speak at Mindvalley University.  A dream I 

launched 2 years ago that is now coming true. This year I’m bringing my son. It will be his first trip overseas and our first trip just the 2 of us.  I know many Moms struggle with leaving their kids. I have found a WONDERFUL way to prepare the kids, and our whole family whenever I leave. (Tips on Mommy guilt coming later…)

Here are some of the tools I’ve used that have made traveling a LOT easier.

First and foremost spend LOTS of one on one time with them before you leave. Need I say more?  If you’re a parent you get it.

I buy a dollar store gift for every day I’m gone.  It helps them get excited to get out of bed and my husband has really easy mornings with them when they have this to look forward to and keep them busy.  They usually contain simple games, or an easy dot to dot coloring book or painting project.  They love them.  Quick warning…husbands don’t like Silly String 🙂

In a jar with a label, I leave 1 kiss for each kid for each day that I’m away.  This way when there are only a few left they know I’ll be home soon.  And they know I’m thinking of them and this is my “KISS”.

I can’t leave without a detailed spreadsheet for everyone who will be helping out.  It includes their daily schedule, their morning, afterschool and evening routines.  Everyone and anyone’s phone numbers, including friends parents for play dates.  All of their activities are on there.  Who’s picking up who when.  AND their logins for certain apps or websites they might use.  Like ABC Mouse or Lexia Core.

spreadsheet

I can’t forget about my first love. 🙂  I leave daily cards or notes for my husband so he knows how grateful I am for him while he’s doing extra duties around the house and with the kids.  I’ve left little notes in our shower or bathroom and full handwritten cards and letters.  Sometimes I ask the kids to give them to him once I’m gone in a nice box so they have that to look forward to the day I leave.

I always ask my kids to give me one of their “lovies” or stuffed animals while I travel.  So I can take photos of where I am and show them what I’m up to.  They know that I snuggle these lovies at night and think about them all the time.  These lovies have more fun then the average person.  🙂  One time they were dancing on stage in front of hundreds of people.  The kids LOVED it.

 

Once I started doing all of this when I went out of town it was a LOT easier to leave.  My kids don’t whine about it.  They actually look forward to it. 🙂

I always return with a present or a treat.  And even if they miss me while I’m gone they have a lot of reinforcement that I’m thinking of them and that I’ll be back soon.

Will my kids be ok while I’m away?

The answer is HELL YES they will.

Now for those Moms who are longing to travel but still feel their kids will not be ok without them.  I can tell you from experience it has HELPED my kids.  They realize that they don’t need me for everything. They’re more self-reliant when I’m gone.  I feel it’s ok for kids to miss someone.  It doesn’t break them like we fear.  They’re stronger than we know.  A few days away is just a blip on the radar in their long and beautiful lives.  It’s important for me to teach my kids how to handle challenging situations. How to get by and manage the day without me over their shoulder.  And it teaches them how to have reverence for something, to be grateful when something returns, with gifts. 🙂  When I travel alone it helps them learn all of that.   It has really enhanced our lives.   I hope this enhances yours.

Loving this life and travel,

Steffani

Busy Is Our B!tch.

Busy Is Our B!tch.

Life gets busy.

Like crazy busy.

But here’s a secret.

It’s our thoughts and not the circumstances we find ourselves under that bring us stress.

Even when our plate is so full that it feels like we might crumble or like we just might not make it…

We will.

Even when it feels impossible to get it all done…

We manage to do it. All of it.

We always do don’t we?

Our thoughts can get so stressful.

“I can’t do it all.”

“It’s too much.”

“I don’t have enough time”

“I need more support.”

Those thoughts are the enemy.

Reclaim your time.

Here’s what I do to get rid of those negative thoughts and take back my time.

  • Write everything down – every little detail.
  • Keep a running list of the things that pop up that have been missed or are looming.
  • Schedule time in your calendar to do them.
  • Don’t just think about it. Book the sitter and schedule it in.

Then get after it. Like the Badass Mom that you are.

We can do this Mommas! This has got nothing on us.

Busy is our bitch!

Stef

Yesterday I Broke Down in Tears

Yesterday I Broke Down in Tears

It was a long day with the kids.

Zoe got mad and threw something that hit me in the face.

That’s what triggered it but not why I cried.

I cried because sometimes it’s really hard to parent my kids.

My story is…

  • They’re explosive.
  • Fighting happens. Often.
  • School gives them a hard time.
  • They never stop moving. Or taking. Or whining.
  • They are very needy.

And that is just exhausting.

That’s the story that took over as I cried in my room.

Self-defeating thoughts included:

“This is too hard.”

“I’m not good at this.”

“They’re so hard to parent.”

“Why can’t this be easier?”

Those were the feelings that swept over me.

But not for long.

I know not to believe and buy into the thoughts that don’t serve me. I can use them as fuel to make positive change. In this instance, to create some boundaries with Zoe around how she treats people.

But I can’t let stressful thoughts spiral out of control. Or they’ll start to define me. They’ll define us.

“It’s the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.”

Aristotle was right. When we know how to let the thoughts that don’t serve us pass us by, we can find more peace. And love the people closest to us.

This is powerful work we’re up to.

Feel it. Honor it. But then don’t believe it.

Choose the thoughts that empower you and support your growth. They’re always available.

Need help? Join me for the Badass Life Intensive.