People Think I Have An “Easy” Life

People Think I Have An “Easy” Life

People think I have an “easy” life. Someone actually said to me recently…

“Sure it’s easy for you, you’re married and your husband has money.”

What they didn’t know is: I met John when he had a broken arm and a broken leg and wasn’t working.

What they don’t know is: He struggled battling drugs and alcohol for the first 8 years of our relationship.

What they don’t know is: He got sober at 28 and through it all, I never left his side.

What they don’t know is: I saw in him what he lost for many years, the man who could have this life. The man who deserved this life.

What they don’t know is: We both had big dreams. And we both went after them.

What they don’t know is: We’re both self-made We’ve earned every penny we have.

What they don’t know is: We still struggle sometimes, we’re both explosive and we fight a lot.

What they don’t know is: We agreed a long time ago, lifetimes ago, to have this life together. And that overrides everything.

What they don’t know is: We’ve earned this life we have. We’ve earned this love. We’ve earned this abundance. We’ve earned it all.

Things can appear so easy. We never know what someone went through to get all they have or what they’re going through now.

The important thing to remember is we create our lives. Every moment of them. We chose who we’re with. We choose our experiences. We create our abundance or lack of it. There is nothing in our lives that is beyond our control.

If you want something. Go after it. Earn it. And it can be yours.

Why Moms Need to Travel …

Why Moms Need to Travel …

I know this will ruffle some feathers.

We’ve all witnessed the soccer field conversations where Moms wear their loyalty like a badge of honor and try and one-up each other about who has gone longer without leaving their kids.   I hate that game, I always lose instantly.

I love to travel alone.  And I have two young kids.  So I’ve heard it all.

The judgments.   “How can you leave for that long?   Kids need their Mommy”. (Said by my Mom MANY times by the way)

The passive aggressive comments.  “Oh I could never leave my kids.  I would just miss them too much.”  (Oh and I apparently am not as loving is that what you mean?)

And the Moms who long for it.  “God I would love to do that.   Teach me how.”

I’m not here to convert anyone.   Or tell anyone how they should parent.   I’m just here to share my beliefs and to inspire the few who might be longing for more to take action on that desire and book a trip.

I believe that Moms should travel.  IF they’re longing for it.   IF it interests them.   IF there are things that they’re really excited about and places they’re dying to visit.

Here’s why I travel…..

I travel to be a better person. 

I mainly travel to conferences and personal growth experiences.   So I mean that very literally.   But even when I’ve traveled just purely for pleasure I feel like I grow as a person and as a Mom.

I travel to have time to deeply look at my life.

When I’m away I have new mental clarity for the vision I have for my life.   I always end up texting my husband some deep, meaningful messages filled with gratitude and big dreams and he always comments….”  you’re in your travel state of mind”.   He’s right.  Because when I’m away and not dealing with all the logistics of parenting I have room to dream.

I travel to sleep through the night without getting up ONCE.

Not much to explain here.  If you have kids….you get it.

I travel to explore new cultures and have new experiences.

My life is enhanced by new experiences and I don’t consider a new store opening or a new movie coming out a NEW experience.

I travel to meet new people who are very different from me.

I have a friend named Juraj from Slovakia.   He’s the smartest man I’ve ever know.   And really positive.   Really happy.   Really healthy.   We just click.  I met him and his amazing  girlfriend Jana at a conference years ago.   It’s one of the most beautiful friendships I’ve ever had.   We’ve traveled together.   My kids adore them.   I couldn’t imagine my life without friends like this.   And I feel like I can only meet them when I travel.

I travel to allow my husband the chance to be fully in charge.

When we were new parents, we had a therapist tell us once.“  Let your husband have one day a week by himself with your son.” It was the best advice we could have been given as new parents.  It really helped me to let go, and him to step up.  When I travel, I arrange A LOT, spreadsheets, sitters, rides to hockey games.  But my husband also has to do a LOT without me.  And that is a good thing.

I travel to be more grateful. 

When I’m away, I long for what I have.   I’m always SO EXCITED to come home.   I can’t wait to tackle my kids and fill their bodies with kisses.   I can’t wait to tackle my husband and fill him with kisses.   I can’t wait to sleep in my own bed and drive my car and take a steam shower.   I love my life and am even MORE grateful for it when I come home from any length trip.

Mainly I travel to come back a new ME.    A new and improved version of myself.   Whether it’s an overnight in the city with my girlfriends or 9 days in Kuala Lumpur to teach a program, I return anew.   How can I not?   New experiences = New reality.

They say distance makes the heart grow fonder.  I say distance makes me a more patient, tolerant and loving mom.  It helps me have more reverence for this life I’ve created.  Even my son’s bedwetting, even my daughter’s potty mouth, even my Mom’s judgmental comments about my travels.   I embrace life in a different way when I get home.   And that alone makes it all so worth it.

Stay tuned for next week’s blog with tips and tricks on how to prepare your family while you travel and to answer the question ….will my kids be ok while I’m away?

Now who wants to travel with me?

Loving this life and travel,

Steffani
Founder and Happiness Coach at www.myhappilife.com
steffani@myhappilife.com

 

When Dreams Come True We Create a New Normal

When Dreams Come True We Create a New Normal

When dreams come true . . . .

I had a big revelation yesterday about the way we adjust our lives to suit our dreams.

I spent the day at Mindvalley.   An amazing company based in Kuala Lumpur that I’ve always dreamed of visiting.  And now I know people there, and I was hired to come teach a program to their team.   Years ago this wouldn’t even have been on my radar.   I would have never even dreamed I’d be here hanging out and teaching a program.

As I sat there, in Vishen Lashinis office I had a moment.   I DREAMED of being here.  And now I’m here.   This should be a big deal.   But it’s not anymore.

It’s amazing how we evolve and suddenly what once were dreams now become amazingly normal.   Our “new normal”.   We adjust and shift and BAM, new normal.  We launch a rocket of desire, then it happens, new normal.

Check out this quick little video to hear details . . . .

What has become your new normal?

Let’s celebrate these new normals together.

Loving this life and travel,
Steffani