I’ve been struggling
steffani

I’ve been struggling

I’ve been struggling.  I’ve been struggling with letting go.  I’ve been struggling with over thinking.  I’ve been. struggling with doing too much and getting nowhere.  I’ve been struggling with trying too hard.  With forcing.  With over controlling.   With trying to control the world actually.  With trying to control other peoples worlds too.  I’ve been struggling. 

Can you relate?  

This is a regular occurrence for me.  It’s cyclical.  I struggle.  I keep struggling. I try fighting it.  I try pushing it away.  I struggle more.  And then I break down.   I crash and burn.  I get sick or overwhelmed and I give up.  I throw my hands in the air.   I drop down to my knees (literally) and I surrender.  I let go and let God.  

And undoubtedly here’s what happens….   It all gets easier.   

Just like that things start getting better.  It’s like a slingshot.  Like I’ve been pulled back so far there’s only one way up and out and the second I let go I get catapulted forward. 

 I don’t struggle as often as I used to.  It happens less and less frequently and I catch it sooner these days.   The minute I catch it I have an array of things I can do to instantly let go.   

Here’s the short list: 

  • Sing
  • Dance 
  • Laugh
  • Do a cartwheel
  • Call a friend 
  • Listen to a podcast
  • Find an inspiring video  
  • Brew a cup of coffee
  • Sing some more 
  • Shout at the top of my lungs “I LOVE MY LIFE” 
  • Pet my dog 
  • Pet my husband 
  • Do dishes (Kidding…  I hate doing dishes!) 
  • Take a bath
  • Hug a tree
  • Feel the sunshine on my face
  • Pray 
  • Meditate 
  • Take a long hot steam shower
  • Take a walk in nature 

And use this mantra:

It’s my time.  Align.  Align. Align.  I release the how.  Allow.  Allow. Allow.

The truth is everything we want is achievable when we let go.  It’s the way we allow in all our desires.  We’re just stuck in the illusion of lack and fear and the hustle.  We’re stuck believing that the harder we paddle upstream that we’ll get downstream.  Life doesn’t work that way.  The minute we let go of the oars our boat turns and we allow our  dreams in.  

Are you struggling in any area of life?  

What can you do to let go?  

I Broke Down In Tears
steffani

I Broke Down In Tears

Yesterday I broke down in tears. It was a long day with the kids. Zoe got mad and threw something that hit me in the face. That’s what triggered it but not why I cried. I cried because I fell into an old pattern. An old story that used to creep up on me all the time. That story is…”it’s really hard to parent my kids.” 

And here’s all the evidence I’ve built up behind that story:

They’re explosive. 

They fight a lot. 

They have a hard time in school. 

They never stop moving. Or taking. Or whining. 

They are very needy. 

And just exhausting. 

That story took over as I cried in my room. With a lot of self defeating thoughts. 

“This is too hard.”

“I’m not good at this.”

“They’re so hard to parent.”

“Why can’t this be easier?” 

“I’m a terrible mom!”

These feelings swept over me. But not for long. I’ve been doing this work for too long to let this old pattern reemerge. I know not to believe and buy into the thoughts that don’t serve me. I can use them as fuel to make positive change. In this instance to create some boundaries with Zoe around how she treats people. But I can’t let stressful thoughts spiral out of control. Or they’ll start to define me. They’ll define us. 

“It’s the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.”

Aristotle was right. When we know how to let the thoughts that don’t serve us pass us by we can find more peace and love the people closest to us. 

This is powerful work we’re up to. Feel it. Honor it. But then don’t believe it. Choose the thoughts that empower you and support your growth. They’re always available. 

Believe in yourself, but not in your thoughts.  I believe in you,

 

Why Do We Suffer?
steffani

Why Do We Suffer?

The reason we suffer is because we think the world should operate differently than it does.

We believe people should do what WE think they should do.
We think things should unfold in our favor. Always.
And that things should be easier than they are. 

We’re ‘shoulding’ all over ourselves. This ‘shoulding’ is the root of our stress. Not the actual events.  Or the people. Or the words.  When we have radical acceptance for life and really unconditionally love everyone around us, our world changes.  We begin to see everything as perfect. Even the “problems”. Even the pain and suffering. Even the Pandemic. Even the trauma. 

When we radically accept our world and our circumstances we find peace. When we sit with all experiences as the truth of that they are completely perfect for the unfolding of our soul experience, then we find not only peace but bliss. 

Can you get a glimpse of this? Life gets easier when we get here.

It’s our birthright.  Life is not about suffering.  It’s about radical acceptance, finding our inner strength, and finding as much joy along the journey as possible.  Life is too precious to be spent suffering.  

Let me know if you need help with this. #nextlevellife