What Do You Want To Be Known For?
stefadmin

What Do You Want To Be Known For?

Many years ago (23 to be exact) I was living in the city and I met these Irish kids who moved in across the street from me for the summer.

Eighteen of them moved into a 3 bedroom apartment! It was close quarters obviously but they all got along. They were loving and kind to each other. They were always checking in and supporting each other. They had a sense of compassion that I had never seen before.

I fell in love with each and every one of them. I liked them. I liked the way they lived their lives. I liked the way they lead with their hearts.

I hired many of them to work for me and helped others find jobs. My brother and I gave them extra furniture and pots and pans that we didn’t need. They became like family. Every year for about 5 years they would send more Irish over to us and I would hire them, help them find apartments, and take care of them like they were my own kids.

They made me a better person by being such good people.

I was reflecting recently after one of the Irish girls was in town with her Mom about why that time in my life was so special. I think they helped me to shape the person I wanted to become and through their kindness I was even more kind. Through their love I was more loving. Through their compassion I was more compassionate and through their grace I learned grace. They were the best friends I’ve ever known. They taught me friendship on another level that most Americans don’t ever get to experience.

Last night I was watching the last episode of a show I LOVED called Better Things and the daughter said this to the Mom.

“You’re nice. You’re a good person. You make people feel comfortable. You help people. I like you. I like the way you live your life.”

And I cried.

That’s what I want to be known for: for being nice, for being a good person, for making people feel good, for helping and for living my life true to those values.

What do you want to be known for? #soulhappy

Why PRAYING Doesn’t Work
stefadmin

Why PRAYING Doesn’t Work

The difference between a prayer and a manifestation.

I have been exploring my spirituality for decades.  I think we all have, in one form or another.  Through loss and through life, we are always feeling into what this life experience is and what’s underneath it all.  What is the PURPOSE of life?  Why are we here? 

I’ve been exploring it, but I have always KNOWN it.  I always felt it – that deeper calling, that resonance, that BELIEF and that grace. 

Even as a kid I knew there was something bigger than me that was guiding me forward.  In the 70’s and 80’s we called it ESP.  I felt and I knew I had whatever that was.  Extra Sensory Perception – or a 6th sense – intuition – an ability to tap into another dimension.  I feel it is available to everyone.  It’s just that some of us are more open to it and have a more heightened awareness of it. 

With this knowingness life feels easier at times and a lot harder at times.  Sometimes it’s comforting.  Sometimes it’s confrontational.  Sometimes it’s weird and sometimes it’s wonderful.  But it was always, ALWAYS there to pull me forward and to help me in the darkest of times.  Times like when my sister died, when my Dad left, when the divorce was final, when I saw how broken our family was and when I took that leap out into the real world without a safety net.  There was always a power greater than me that I could lean on. 

I never really prayed except for one time when my sister was in a coma.  I prayed for her to stay here and to get better.  I prayed for her not to die.  When she did die,  I never prayed again.  It never felt right to me.  It felt like I was begging and pleading for something that was beyond my control. I was.


difference between prayer and manifestationI remember when things shifted from praying, or not praying into placing orders.  I was in college, getting my degree in theater, and I decided I wanted a certain part in a play.  I wanted it really badly but the odds were stacked against me.  There was a senior girl who always got the leads.  But I had such a strong desire so I asked for it.  I didn’t pray for it.  I announced it.  It was more of a “I will have this!” and not a “please can I have this.”  I demanded it.  I expected it.  I declared it. I wasn’t going to back down from it.  I auditioned with a KNOWINGNESS that I was getting that part.  During the audition I was pretending I was playing the part on stage.  I wasn’t auditioning for it.  I was BEING it. 

And I got it.  I didn’t even need to look at the sheet of paper with the parts announced.  I knew it.  With every fiber of my being I knew it. 

This was a different type of prayer.  Today I know it was a manifestation and I can see how and why it was so effective. 

I decided that I wanted it.  I knew I could have it.  I declared it. I acted as if it already happened.  I was BEING it, before I even got it.  I expected it, beyond a shadow of a doubt.  I KNEW it was mine.  And…. I let it go.  I never sat for a moment in the possibility that I wouldn’t have it but I also let go of any attachment to it.  I ALLOWED it in through my detachment. 

This is how manifesting works.  It is different from a prayer for me, it’s a knowingness, an expectation and a decision.  We align with it and allow it in and it’s ours.   

If you want help with manifesting stay tuned for a chance to jump in on the new round of my group coaching program.

Building Your Life On a Solid Foundation
steffani

Building Your Life On a Solid Foundation

At the end of 2019 I was speaking at a retreat in Scottsdale, Arizona.  This retreat was designed for six, seven and eight figure female entrepreneurs to come together and to take their lives and their businesses to the “next level”.  I was honored to be a keynote speaker on the last day teaching some advanced concepts around goal setting.  I was told these women “had it all”.  So I was customizing my workshop accordingly.  But when I was participating in the 4 days leading up to my workshop I found something very different from what I was expecting. While having meals with these ladies, going on hikes with them and participating in the workshops there was one word these ladies used more than any other word…. 

Exhausted. 

These ladies were all exhausted.  They were overwhelmed and drained.  Sure they had created a lot of financial freedom in their lives but that financial freedom wasn’t buying them the inner peace and the happiness they were all desperately seeking. The reason why might be very simple but it’s not always common practice.  

They were exhausted because although they spent time, energy and attention on their career and financial life, they never dedicated any time, energy or attention on their foundation.  They worked on their business, but they never did the work on themselves. 

Most people are trying to build their lives on a weak foundation. 

Trying to build their relationships, their careers, their financial independence, their environments, their experiences on top of weak pillars. 

The foundational pillars that I see lacking most often are the foundational pillars in our personal life. 

  • Our health and fitness 
  • Our emotional resilience 
  • Our mindset 
  • Our character traits and values 
  • Our religion or spiritual connection 
  • And who we show up as in the world 

When we put energy, attention and focus into these 6 pillars we can build not only a career we love but a life we love. But it takes work.  It takes daily work on ourselves.   It takes getting in the right state and thinking the right thoughts.   Feeding our mind, body and soul the right things so we can show up in the world as everything but ‘exhausted’.   When we work on ourselves we are ready for any of the challenges that life can and will throw our way.  And we’re more present to the moments we all live for, the peace, the joy, the reverence for life and all its beauty and all its imperfections.  

Jim Rohn put it best when he said “Your level of success will rarely exceed your level of personal development, because success is something you attract by the person you become.” He was encouraging his students to build a solid foundation.  Because he knew that foundation is what would lead to their ultimate success.